REPUBLIKA.CO.ID, JAKARTA -- Luqman's Chapter verse 15, contains an explanation about exceptions in complying with parental orders. It is based on Tafsir Al-Mishbah by Prof. Dr. Quraish Shihab.
“After the previous verse (verse 14 of Surah Luqman) emphasized the importance of filial service to the father, now the case is described that is the exception of obeying the orders of both parents, while underlining Luqman's will to his son about the necessity of abandoning characterization in form and when and wherever,” the Quraish explains.
Allah SWT berfirman:
وَإِن جَٰهَدَاكَ عَلَىٰٓ أَن تُشْرِكَ بِى مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِۦ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا ۖ وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِى ٱلدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًا ۖ وَٱتَّبِعْ سَبِيلَ مَنْ أَنَابَ إِلَىَّ ۚ ثُمَّ إِلَىَّ مَرْجِعُكُمْ فَأُنَبِّئُكُم بِمَا كُنتُمْ تَعْمَلُونَ
“And if both compel you to associate with Me something of which you have no knowledge, then do not follow the two of them, and get along well with them in the world, and follow the path of the one who returns to Me, then only to-
Return to you, and I will tell you what you have done.” (QS. Luqman verse 15) Quraish explains that a child is forced by both parents, one of the two, or even another, to associate with Allah in all things. So, do not obey those orders.
“Nevertheless, do not break ties with him or disrespect him. But remain devoted to both as long as it does not contradict the teachings of your religion and associate the two in the world, that is, as long as they live and in worldly affairs, not religion, in a good way of socializing,” he said.
In this explanation, the Quraish reminds that the filial attitude to the elderly should not be at the expense of religious principles. Therefore, Allah commands to heed the guidance of religion and to follow the path of the one who always returns to Him in all matters of the world, because all affairs of the world return to Allah.
“The patron of the word 'Jahadaka' used in this verse (verse 15 of Surah Luqman) describes an earnest effort. If even serious efforts are prohibited, which in this case can be in the form of threats, certainly even more so if it is simply an invitation or warning,” he said.
That is, even if a parent intends to force and even threaten his child to ensnare Allah, the child is still forbidden to obey him. Obedience to such coercion is prohibited, especially if it is only in the form of a warning or exhortation.